Winter Depression
Posted: Sun Dec 15, 2024 2:23 pm
Hey everyone.
Sorry I've been a bit absent from the forum the last couple of weeks. I struggle a lot this time of year. I don't love that I wake up and it's dark for a few hours, and by the time I go to sleep, it's been dark for a few hours. I've always found my darkest moments in my mental health have always been in the deepest parts of the winter darkness. Don't worry, though, I haven't been at the deepest darkest places in quite a while, and I've made lots of small improvements to help me get through it each year. I need to get outside while the sun is actually out, even if it's cold. I need to make sure I'm doing something creative, which has lead me to learning more songs on the piano. I've even been trying to get better with my accordion, which has been neato.
Anyways, I just want to use this as an opportunity to thank everyone here. I didn't ever expect to have a community rallied around an idea that I support. I am wildly grateful for everyone who has been kind and wanting to share their thoughts here, and it really has put so much warmth into my heart.
I spent a majority of my 20's being really hard on myself. I thought that I was stupid, that no one cared, that I was a burden. Time and time again, I was proven wrong by people in my life who care about me, and that really helped get me through it. I think, though, part of that never truly went away. I think I just got good at ignoring the thoughts, you know?
When I uploaded the cookie video, I was met with the biggest group of people proving those thoughts wrong over and over and over. It was overwhelming, in a really good way. The thoughts that have plagued my mind for so much of my life were being challenged in such vast numbers that I couldn't ignore it. I know I love being wrong and all that, but this was a whole other level. Even thinking about it now, I'm starting to tear up. I don't know why you all care but I'm so happy that you do.
To have all this really good feeling stuff be halted by just seasonal depression has been a little discouraging, I'll admit. But, I have to also admit, it has made the winter a lot better than the last.
I'm still going to struggle to keep up with posts for a month longer, I suspect. Just know that I'm so thrilled that you're here.
I know I am not alone in the winter struggle, so I want to offer you a challenge. Think of someone you enjoy the company of. It could be a sibling, a friend, even someone you've been out of touch with for a while. Just really put that person into your brain.
Now call them (or text, I'm not your dad) and say that you were thinking of them. Tell them that they are loved, they are worthy of love, and they are not a burden. Remind them of a favorite memory you share. Even if you think they're doing a-okay, just.. trust me. It will mean the world to them. If you think of a few people, contact them the same way. If you think of someone like 5 weeks from now, do it then. Remind the people that you love that you love them. It makes such a gigantic difference, believe me.
Have a good rest of the year everyone, and there's a new video that drops today so say hi if you're around for that premiere. I hope to catch up soon and see what everyone has been up to.
Sorry I've been a bit absent from the forum the last couple of weeks. I struggle a lot this time of year. I don't love that I wake up and it's dark for a few hours, and by the time I go to sleep, it's been dark for a few hours. I've always found my darkest moments in my mental health have always been in the deepest parts of the winter darkness. Don't worry, though, I haven't been at the deepest darkest places in quite a while, and I've made lots of small improvements to help me get through it each year. I need to get outside while the sun is actually out, even if it's cold. I need to make sure I'm doing something creative, which has lead me to learning more songs on the piano. I've even been trying to get better with my accordion, which has been neato.
Anyways, I just want to use this as an opportunity to thank everyone here. I didn't ever expect to have a community rallied around an idea that I support. I am wildly grateful for everyone who has been kind and wanting to share their thoughts here, and it really has put so much warmth into my heart.
I spent a majority of my 20's being really hard on myself. I thought that I was stupid, that no one cared, that I was a burden. Time and time again, I was proven wrong by people in my life who care about me, and that really helped get me through it. I think, though, part of that never truly went away. I think I just got good at ignoring the thoughts, you know?
When I uploaded the cookie video, I was met with the biggest group of people proving those thoughts wrong over and over and over. It was overwhelming, in a really good way. The thoughts that have plagued my mind for so much of my life were being challenged in such vast numbers that I couldn't ignore it. I know I love being wrong and all that, but this was a whole other level. Even thinking about it now, I'm starting to tear up. I don't know why you all care but I'm so happy that you do.
To have all this really good feeling stuff be halted by just seasonal depression has been a little discouraging, I'll admit. But, I have to also admit, it has made the winter a lot better than the last.
I'm still going to struggle to keep up with posts for a month longer, I suspect. Just know that I'm so thrilled that you're here.
I know I am not alone in the winter struggle, so I want to offer you a challenge. Think of someone you enjoy the company of. It could be a sibling, a friend, even someone you've been out of touch with for a while. Just really put that person into your brain.
Now call them (or text, I'm not your dad) and say that you were thinking of them. Tell them that they are loved, they are worthy of love, and they are not a burden. Remind them of a favorite memory you share. Even if you think they're doing a-okay, just.. trust me. It will mean the world to them. If you think of a few people, contact them the same way. If you think of someone like 5 weeks from now, do it then. Remind the people that you love that you love them. It makes such a gigantic difference, believe me.
Have a good rest of the year everyone, and there's a new video that drops today so say hi if you're around for that premiere. I hope to catch up soon and see what everyone has been up to.
.